I don't know

The past few days my Facebook status updates have deviated from my usual "oh it's a great day to run on the beach."  Lately, they read  more like self-help maxims than snippets of my daily routine.  I didn't intend to run into Jack Handy.  Something else is guiding me...my inner writer's voice, perhaps?  She is whispering to my fingers, and for the first time in my life I'm not resisting, not ignoring my muse.  Gab on, sistah.

Jitters

Well, it's happened. I posted this URL on Facebook. No longer will this be a place just for me or family...now all my friends, acquaintances and business contacts know about my secret hiding place. LOL. It's a good thing. Scary but good. Intimidating yet not overwhelming. Revealing my deepest thoughts frightens me. It exposes my vulnerabilities. But if I'm to become a better writer I need to put myself out there.
Brace yourselves.

Your Best

I love to learn new things.  I especially love learning ways to be a better Me.  Whether it's innovations in nutrition or fitness that help me be healthier, or ground-breaking technologies that help me be more eco-focused, I am compelled to strive toward higher standards.  But let me be clear: I'm not pursuing perfection.  I'm human, a spiritual being who intends to do the right thing in every situation.  Still, I get angry.  I have blah days.  Sometimes I feel insecure about my appearance or my relationships or the fact I've not achieved my goals as a writer.  Most days I feel great about me, though.  I know my heart is filled with love and authenticity, my mind strong, my body healthy.  I'm not perfect, nor do I want to be.

Perfection is unattainable and I'm not interested in spinning my wheels trying to achieve something that is not even possible.  Waste of my precious moments!  It isn't that perfection is difficult...it's IMPOSSIBLE.  Not just for me, for everyone.  Because THERE IS NO SUCH THING as a perfect human being.  We have emotions and lapses in judgment, and thereby are incapable of being perfect...consistent...robotic.  I'm always up for a good challenge, but not a physical impossibility.  Striving toward perfection would be as sensible as striving toward being 21-years-old again.  (Not that I actually want to go back to that period of my life, but you get my point...I hope.  :-)

What I really want, is to feel my best, to do my best, to give my best...to be my best.  I want to be as healthy as I can be on every level.  As a mommy, a wife, a writer, an entrepreneur, I work really hard.  I want to be the best I can be at every role.  Not better than you or her or him, the best Me I can be.  I nurture others so they can feel, do, give and become their best.  If I'm my best, and I encourage the people around me to be their best, then I'm doing my part to make the world -- and my life! -- a better place.  My best and your best -- not perfection -- is always good enough.

Daily Worship

I've been running a lot lately.  Maybe not far (about 3.5 mi), and definitely not fast (apx. 35 min).  But it has definitely become integral to my daily routine.  Mornings, Sage and I clean a little, eat a little, read a little.  And talk...A LOT.  (She has so much to say, all the time.  I wonder where she gets that???)  Cleaning usually involves putting away her books and organizing her toys, or dusting the tables.  Her favorite task is washing dishes.  She also likes helping Mommy juice veggies and fruits for the day.  We sip our smoothies and talk about what we plan to do today, all the while munching on fruit and maybe watching a few minutes of Elmo or Dora.  After lunch we brush our teeth and go down for a nap.  Sometimes willingly, sometimes kicking and screaming.

And then...I take a deep breath.  Between making enough smoothies and juice for two adults and one growing little girl, washing and prepping fruit to snack on all day, cleaning, eating, reading and planning our day, and sneaking in a moment or two of work here and there, I'm pooped by naptime.  I lace up my 'racing day shoes' as Sage calls them, turn on my iPod, and head out the door.  I let my subconscious choose the music.  One day, Bob Dylan or the Blackeyed Peas motivate me.  Another, ZZ Top or Dvorak.  I clear my mind, or at least try to, and let my legs do all the work.  Usually but not always I wear a stopwatch.  I like to set personal bests but whether or not I do, I enjoy every run.  I run the same route but it's definitely not routine.  The beach changes day by day, hour by hour...sometimes minute by minute.  Fascinating and always stimulating.

Running, stretching and cooldown takes about 45 minutes.  That's my time.  And so worth it, because after my run I feel all my little stresses and tension-triggers massaged out.  I work a little more, I sip some watermelon and spinach smoothie.  I'm ready for post-nap playtime!  I've worshipped at the altar of nature.  My soul is whole, my mind is clear and my body is relaxed.

My garden(s)

Here is my vegetable and herb garden on February 28th.  The three distinct plants in the middle of the raised bed are red bell peppers.  Along the edges of the bed are seaside strawberries.  The tomato cage on the left side of the bed protects fennel, and throughout the bed are little tomato seedlings.  I'll post a pic later today of what the garden looks like now.  The seedlings are huge compared to this pic!  And I already have about a dozen strawberries...

The pots serve as my herb garden.  I have Copper Canyon Daisy, oregano, thyme, rosemary, lemongrass, onion chives, leeks and mint.  The clay pot on the ground to the right of the veggie bed contains irises from my Grandma's house in Kentucky.  In the background, under the window, is a bay tree in a glazed pot.  It will be going into the ground soon...

To the left of the garden is a small sandbox -- Folsom's 'potty'!  Don't mind the a/c unit eyesore.  ;-)

My chimenea got a lot of use last fall.  Mesquite smells so warm and earthy when it burns, and the smoke deters mosquitoes.  They are BRUTAL here.

I have more clay pots to fill with herbs...basil, especially.  Soon I'll have another raised bed to grow cucumbers and peas, and maybe an area for berrying bushes.  I want to grow blueberries and raspberries -- they are so expensive at the grocery store and usually are poor quality.  We plow through a boatload of produce each week and I want to nourish us with the freshest, chemical-free and locally grown produce possible...and that doesn't break my budget!

Happy Strawberry Day!

This morning Sage and I had a plate of fresh, raw strawberries and blueberries.  We also had a smoothie made with fresh-squeezed orange juice, cantaloupe and banana.  No dairy, just water and ice added to fresh fruit.  She asked where her heart balloon went.  I reminded her that we set it free (and for the record I realize this is not a very eco-friendly gesture but neither is throwing the mylar into the landfill.)  She thought about it for a moment, and I also reminded her that we will be getting green balloons soon for St. Patrick's Day.  I also told her that she is Irish through my dad's family.  Then my little brain started thinking of our heritage...and all the things I want to teach her about the Cherokees, Germans, Swedes, English and Freedmen.  I want to learn more about our heritage, too.

Suddenly I remembered I had bought her a book about a Cherokee legend called The First Strawberries.  So we dug through all her baskets of books until we found it.  I read the story to her while we nibbled on our fruit.  At the end, the lesson is revealed: strawberries remind us to be kind to others, and that "friendship and respect are as sweet as the ripe, red berries."  Lovely!  I explained the words to Sage, and gave examples of kindness she might remember.  We decided then and there today would be Strawberry Day. 

Now she's napping and I'm catching up on work, housework, and writing.  Finally, I'm writing.  This afternoon we might open up our art box and create a masterpiece with a strawberry theme.  Or perhaps we will find and make a new recipe using strawberries.

How will you spend your 'berry' special day?

Brainfried

I've been writing and editing, writing and editing web content for a couple of weeks.  (Check out http://www.nativedave.com/ if you want to see my handiwork.)  My brain isn't exactly dead, but it is fried.  Well done.  Almost overcooked.